The Oprah Winfrey Show

(for the record, I really love her show and I think she's great, along with Barbara Walters)



Oprah: Thank you everyone! I am very happy tonight as I am finally being honoured as the Queen of the World. Finally, you have all come to realise my powers over the female race. They scream and faint with just a sniff of my Dior perfume. Ah, and not to mention the little fortune I have made over all these years by acting in front of the cameras. Sigh.. I could feed California for a couple of years if I wanted too with my stash. Anyway, where is the tiara?Just pass the god-damn thing over and I can finally become your Queen....




Hilary Clinton: Now Miss Chocolate Cookie, I believe that I am the real Queen of the World.




Oprah: Now now girl. I believe that that's not the correct thing to say in front of the millions watching this live broadcast. Go wash your face honey, I think the flour on your face is melting.




Hilary: Hehe... You are always such a comic. Hey chameleon girl, you are blending in with the background. There's a tree behind you. In case you need somewhere to hide.




Oprah: ..........................




Oprah: I am shocked Mrs Clinton. I'm sorry but are you still married to that loser?




Oprah: Anyway, Miss Freaking Shrek. Go chew on a cigar and grab your loser husband back while I get to my throne to become the Woman of this globe.




Hilary: Why you little.....




Rockefeller: For a moment I thought you were'nt gonna make it.

Oprah: For a moment I thought so too. Ooooh... your breasts feel good.

posted by nick_xian @ 1:25 AM