A Day in The Life of an Italian PM

Italian Pm Silvio Berlusconi: And today, on the EU conference, we are to look at the increasingly difficult problem of ......... ( Sigh. Nobody's listening. Wonder why did i have to come here. Let me test it out then.) Blah blah blah, la la, da di da. Wow! Jacques Chirac looks like he is actually listening. Hey! What's that? Eh Blair! Who are you snogging down there? Oh shit! Is that Lewinsky? Oh my god! Hey! Is anyone listening? Aaaargh....





Silvio: So you see, we need to have these meetings in a more serious mood. Nobody was listening to me just now. I was talking nonsense and even caught Blair making out, but absolutely no one was listening.

EU president Joseph Borrell: Hmm.. wonder what's for lunch later. Maybe i can sneak out of the spaniard geezer's speech and grab a drink at the bar outside.....





Spanish Pm Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero: Did you love me? Did you fall in love with my speech just now? I was so very good wasn't i? Look into my eyes and tell me i was wonderful.

Silvio: *smiling politely* (Damn it! Stupid idiot. Get out of my face. Must you stick so bloody close? Wah! Bad breath! Quick, i need air. Must find distraction. Ooooh, his teeth are very nice.)





Austrian Chancellor Wolfgang Schussel: Hey! You gave an inspirational speech just now. You had me at hello. Hello! And how the hell did you withstand Luis Rodriguez? He is totally in love with himself. And did you smell his breath? Eeeew... (Yeah. Now i can just stone and let him yak away.)

Silvio: Hahaha... Glad you noticed. It was nothing much. All i did was to let him talk, you know. Some people just love to talk. And all you need to do is to lend them a listening ear. Haha.. I was great wasn't i? You see, you can learn if you ................. and just buy my instructional videos. Hey! Schussel? SCHUSSEL! Are you still here with me?





Silvio: Haha. It has been a long long time huh! My dearest Jacques. *mumbles* *Better ham it up, there are a lot of reporters around.* Still so young and healthy huh!

French President Jacques Chirac: Hahaha. You stupid fool. Still so childish at heart. Come. Let me smack your hand.





Silvio: Hahaha... You miss. You are getting old. Lie down and rest if you are tired already.

Chirac: Haha... I missed so as not to embarrass you. My hundred fisted buddha slap can destroy all the bones in your puny hand. Hahaha..





Italian President Carlo Azeglio: Mr Berlusconi. Finally i have caught up with you. So how are you going to deal with our faltering economy? You have not handed in the quarterly reports too!

Silvio: Er..... Hey look! What's that in the sky? Its Marilyn Manson, uh i mean Monroe. Hahaha.. Marilyn Monroe.

Azeglio: Monroe? Where, where? Is her skirt up again?





Silvio: Whoa! Lucky i got out of there quick. Shit. I must really start doing real work or that old man will give me the sack.





Silvio: Well, time to go guys. Great to have met you all today. Lets have tea soon. Hahaha.
Oi! Let go of my sleeves Chirac!

Guy talking to lady in red: Quick! Lets get out before they notice us.

posted by nick_xian @ 10:05 PM