Solicited by a ..... (sorry for the inappropriate word usage)

What happened last Thursday was a strange affair. It was almost a week since i had any driving and i was booked for 2 that day. My first session was to start at 10.30am, but i was dedicated to watching Oprah no matter what happened. Thus, i was late. I rushed out of my house with nothing except my ipod, ssdc booklet and bare essentials. Nothing could make me part with my trendy music library.

I alighted at the stop near the Yio Chu Kang mrt station and rushed my way to school. I was near running alright, not just because i was late, dark clouds threatened any tardiness. I crossed my fingers hoping for some respite. However, it was not to be as rain pelted down even before i came close to the school. I had to maintain my cool no matter what, so i walked briskly towards the compound. Well, i was cool. Maybe abit cold too as i was drenched by the time i reached and the freakin air-con was just a bit too powerful for my liking.

Anyway, let me brag for just a sec (its not often that i get to do so). I was so good at my driving that day, the instructor praised me. (those in the know will remember me having an accident on my first day out on the streets) Haha. Stupid Jun Hui! Idiot Chris Moh! All these over-achievers passing their subjects soo quickly. Eat my rain-drenched shorts.

Finshing my lessons, i was on a high. Nothing could have made me come back down. Nothing, except God himself. I was unwilling to fall back into an emotional hellhole after being lifted up by the angels of the driving school. The fluffy white clouds were where i intended to be. Bouncing, flying, looking back down at the mortals as i boarded the fairy train back to my home. As soon as i had taken my place in the train, a stranger came up to me. Stranger, i will call him, as i did not know him then. The young, bespectacled caucasian strutted up to me and looked me in the eye. My ears were filled with the melodious voice of Charlotte Church as i tried to make out what he was saying to me. Before i could get Charlotte to stop asking me to dream a dream with her, his hand was held out before me. I could make no sense of this. In front of me was this young man, whom i still couldnt put a name to, waiting to shake my hand.

I pulled out one of my earphones and caught the words, "Hey! Remember me? I'm your friend." I took his hand and shook it slowly. Very very slowly. Deliberately stalling for time. My mind raced. Who the hell is this ang moh? I suppose he saw beads of sweat forming on my temples and thus decided not to torment me any further. "Okay. I'm not really your friend." Damn! You got that right. "I'm from a church organisation. My name is Paul." I saw that coming and still got hit. Like that 'Scrubs' guy in the doe-eyed deer outfit getting whacked straight in the head. "Uh... ," i said. Well, i could have been a bastard and told him to screw someone elses ass with his lies or told him politely to 'get the hell outta my face cos im a pure blooded buddhist' (oh no. Im sorry for saying all these. Hope god doesnt read blogs), but i didnt. Instead, being the nice guy i was, i decided to let him have a go.

He told me he was sorry to have tricked me and that he just wanted to talk. Oh puh-leeeese. Im such an open guy, anybody could just come up to talk to me. It sounded more like a pick-up line for goodness sake. He continued, "Um, so which stop are you getting off at?" Sigh.. It seems like he isn't very good at this. So i decided to help. "Mine's the next stop. But its kinda far, so you still have some time to talk. Hmmm.. so which branch of the church are you? Catholic? Protestant?", i queried. "Im catholic......" Thats about all i heard as ironic screams of "devil without a cause" piped thru my other ear. "I looked straight into his eyes to camouflage the fact that i wasn't listening at all and laughed secretly at the private joke that Kid Rock made.

"Blah, blah, blah blah," " Wait," i interrupted ( to show that i was still in the conversation) "Its just that your arguments for believing are always going in a circle. Your answers for my questions just keep repeating and do not convince me fully." He looked at me not knowing what to say. *ding ding ding* End of round 1.

My ride was coming to an end as the train neared the station. I dreaded the moment. I knew what he was gonna do but i didnt stop him in time. He began on another of his speeches as the train screeched to a stop. Okay, okay. SMRT trains are so good that they dont screech, but i so hope that they did. Like, *Screech* "Oh sorry, there's my stop. I better go. See ya."

His mouth opened and close, like a fish in its glass bowl. I couldnt hear anything he was saying. My mind was thinking: Okay. Shut it. The freakin door is going to close. Aaaaah! Help me... I looked around pleading for help with my eyes. SOS! Mayday! 五月天! Help me..... A few goddamn girls giggled in the distance.

*Ti ti ti ti* "Aaaargh... The Door Is CLOSING!!!" I could have sworn i screamed it out loud cos he whipped out a namecard and scribbled on it. Thrusting it into my hands and shaking it at the same time, he said that he hoped to see me sometime soon. I gave my fakest and widest smile and told him to meet me in hell. Okay, just joking. I stepped out onto the platform, grateful that i didnt miss my stop. I could cry in happiness. I was sincerely prepared to take the train all the way to Jurong East just to let him finish his piece.

I wasnt traumatized by him as i have been approached by several of such word-spreaders before. (and im sorry to say that i have antagonised quite a few.) It was more so where it had happened. I was in a train for goodness sake. I had always thought that these people lived in the streets just outside mrt stations. Just like those donation-can-holding kids. It just felt like they had trespassed into a previously peaceful sanctuary. Some kind of demilitarized zone where people are not to be disturbed. I mean, what next should i expect to see on the train? Uncles selling newspaper? Aunties selling tissue paper? Donation-can toting school kids? "Uncle, uncle, dont kehsi lah. 2 seconds ago you not sleeping one. Oei, donate money leh."

Sigh. I dont wish to speak on this issue anymore. Its sensitive and thus Carrie cant talk bout it. Anyway, i think Jon will fight me till death bout this.

posted by nick_xian @ 7:40 PM